Never
underestimate the value of asking your partner how his day went. Niceties don't become any less nice just
because they become routine. At the end of the day, even if you felt like no
one cared about anything you did, at least you know your partner will not only
care but want to know details.
2.
Some fights are just fights. They don't have to be deal breakers. You can be madly in love with a person and
still be mad at that person. Fights don't have to spell The End. Couples that
stay together choose the relationship over the conflict.
3.
Accept that relationships come with obligations. You might not want to do everything your
partner wants you to do with him — work events, seeing a band he likes, even
errands — but you also know it makes him happy to have you by his side, which
makes doing those things totally worth it.
4.
But be honest about which events you feel strongly that your partner attend. Not everything can be a must. He knows to
tell you that it's really important you attend Passover seder every year but
will live if you decline an invite to his friend's Super Bowl party. You're
both fair about it.
5.
Little surprise purchases go a long way. Does your partner love mint chocolate
chip ice cream? Picking some up while you're at the store shows you were
thinking of him even while going about your boring everyday chores like
restocking the milk.
6.
Don't force group or double dates when all couples aren't friends. You don't have to share the same friends.
It's OK to still go out one-on-one with your girlfriends, even if you all have
significant others. The guys don't have to be friends just because you are, and
not every conversation is a group conversation anyway.
6.
Kiss hello before doing anything else when you get home. Kiss good-bye when you
leave. It's always just the sweetest
if he has to go to work extra-early but stops by to kiss you quickly while
trying not to wake you. Or when he walks you to the door when you head out. And
an immediate kiss when you reunite at the end of the day means you care about
each other above all else.
7.
Sometimes you have to say no to invitations so you can spend time with each
other. Just because your calendar is blank
one night doesn't mean you have to agree to plans if someone asks. Life gets
weirdly busy as you get older. It's nice to use that free time to just be
together.
8.
Treat his family like yours. They love to know you think of them as family. And your
partner will love to see you treat them like your own family. Call or text from
time to time. Hang out with them when your significant other isn't around.
9.
More "I love you"s are better than fewer. Three words that just never get old. You're
seriously not going to say it too much.
10.
Be sympathetic when your significant other is sick. Maybe it means canceling dinner plans and
picking up soup. Maybe it means running to the drugstore for more cough drops.
Don't complain. No one gets sick on purpose, and if the situation were
reversed, you know he'd take care of you.
11.
Take on more of the errands/household chores when the other one is swamped at
work. No, you don't want
to do laundry, but you do it to make your partner's life easier. And by
checking things off your mutual to-do list, you'll be more likely to do things
you actually enjoy together when his schedule frees up. Plus, you'll have a
crazed period at some point too, and it all evens out in the end.
12.
Don't make jokes at each other's expense. Be respectful and think about what he'd
want you to share with a group. He's your partner, not your punch line.
13.
Be on time. So
many meaningless fights can be avoided by being on time. Start your eyeliner 20
minutes earlier than you think you need to. Chances are either you or your
partner, or someone in the party you're meeting, is sensitive about
punctuality, so be there when you say you will so you don't avoid anyone the
wrong way and seem rude.
14.
If someone talks shit about your S.O., defend him. Even if you're generally too polite to
correct people or call them out on rudeness, sometimes you have to make an
exception. After all, you're supposed to be each other's biggest supporters.
15.
Keep each other informed of your individual plans. You're going to grab a drink with a friend
after work? Great, have fun. But let him know where you're going to be so (1)
he doesn't worry and (2) he knows you won't be around if he wants to make his
own plans. It's not a matter of asking permission — it's a matter of being
courteous because you always want to rest easy knowing your S.O. is alive and
well and not in trouble.
16.
Respond to each other's texts, calls, etc. No screening when it comes to your
significant other. If he needs to get in touch for whatever reason, that should
be a priority.
17.
Choose not to fight when you travel. The luxury hotel you booked turned out to
be not so luxury at all. Or he forgot to pack your toiletry kit like he said he
would. You can get cranky and be That Couple having it out at the airport, or
you can realize you'll have a good story or inside joke in the future.
18.
Be spontaneous. Make
a dinner reservation for just the two of you at the last minute. Or just wander
into your favorite restaurant and eat at the bar. Have random morning sex.
Surprise him with concert tickets. Keeping things unexpected makes being with
the person you love even more fun.
19.
Love each other unconditionally. Sometimes it really is just that simple.
Culled fro the Cosmopolitan
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